Earlier in her career, Amanda Goetz viewed her unrelenting determination as a “badge of honor.”
“I always took it as a sign of pride that I could push myself,” she says.
Goetz, 39, is a longtime marketing executive and two-time startup founder, as well as the creator of “Life’s A Game,” a popular newsletter for aspiring multi-hyphenates.
During the pandemic, Goetz kicked her career ambitions into high gear: she left her corporate job and built her second startup, CBD-based product company House of Wise, all while navigating a difficult divorce and solo-parenting her three small children.
From the outside, Goetz was thriving, but juggling all of her responsibilities with no breaks caused severe burnout, she says.
While raising capital for House of Wise, Goetz ended up in the hospital twice in one week from what she later learned were panic attacks.
“You can handle a lot, until your body just says ‘no,'” she says.
That was a pivotal moment for Goetz: “I realized that you can have it all, just not all at once, and I needed to shift things around and reprioritize my life.”
Finding time for “proactive rest”
Goetz describes her previous attitude toward work as “toxic grit,” which she defines as “hustle without intention.”
“So many of us, especially as ambitious people, are running towards these goals with no checkpoints to understand if that’s even still something we want,” she says.
In order to get a handle on her priorities, Goetz developed a new strategy for “sustainable ambition”: instead of working until she crashes, Goetz intentionally schedules periods of hard work and rest.
“I realized that I needed to alleviate the intensity that was happening in my life before my body would force me to do it,” she says.
According to Goetz, finding balance isn’t necessarily the goal: it’s natural, and often necessary, to adjust our priorities around big life events.
For example, Goetz is currently “hustling” ahead of publishing her first book, “Toxic Grit: How to have it all and (actually) love what you have,” which debuts in October. Afterwards, she plans to put work on the back burner for a couple months to relax and spend time with family.
“It’s about building a rhythm into your life of proactive rest instead of waiting until your body demands it,” she says.
Every few weeks, Goetz reevaluates which areas of her life she needs to invest more energy into. She’s found success in scheduling her work and rest cycles in a 2:1 cadence.
“It can mean two weeks of really pushing at work, and then one week where you kind of take the foot off the pedal and say, OK, I’m going to leave every day at 5 o’clock on the dot, I’m shutting my computer, and I’m going to go see friends,” she says.
Those “bare minimum” periods allow her to create space for the other important aspects of her life, she says.
“If I just let the ambitious side of myself call all the shots, I would work all the time,” she says. “But that’s not what I want for my full life.”
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